Surrender is a word that can elicit several different responses, it did for me when it came to my mind today.  The feeling that stayed with me as I pondered on this word today was peace. Honestly, these past couple of days have been pretty brutal mentally and spiritually, I have felt like my world has be turned upside down and I could not tell which direction I was going in or should go in.  Have you ever felt like that? So of coarse, I am on my knees pleading for direction, for relief, for peace and it didn’t come until this morning when I got up to post my “word of the day” on Facebook.  Surrender…..I feel God whispering to me.  I immediately understood that this didn’t mean give up, this meant let go. I realize right now, I have been trying to force things in a certain direction in my life, I have been painting a picture in my mind and pushing out everything that doesn’t fit into that picture, worst of all the feelings of shame and guilt, worry and fear have begun to creep in.  I love that I can lean into the Lord and that He not only hears and answers, but his love and peace is all encompassing.  I can hear the word and feel the peaceful energy running through my body….surrender, let go and let God.

Sometimes we think and feel that we need to have everything all worked out, have it all planned.  This is not the case when you are inviting God and his Angels into your life. There is so much peace that fills my soul right now realizing that I do not have to have it all figured out, that when I come to Him and put my trust and faith in Him, He truly will provide and work it out as I get still, listen and follow. Is surrendering easy? For me it is not, but it is because I feel that my life is taking a different turn than I expected, I feel somewhat concerned and afraid, as the path I was on looked pretty dang good to me. I’ve been reminded that it’s not always the end result that is important as how we travel the road.  The end result is never what we think it too be, it is usually better, especially when God is involved.  Truth is, the road is windy, curvy and bumpy and really all we have control over is our attitude and our own actions. Really it’s how we travel the road….are we cultivating love, faith, trust, peace within us?  This is truly the most important.  The more still I get and the more I ponder on this word…surrender, the more I understand that God is just asking me to be at peace and let Him do what He does best ….guide.  Do you need to surrender today and let God guide your life?  Just know there is peace and joy and love on the other side and you are not alone! God bless you and I as we surrender to Him today.

Be Still

As I am preparing to uproot my family and move to another location, alone….I am coming to understand and appreciate more and more the counsel from God to “be still and know that I am God.” I woke up this morning feeling a great amount of anxiety because things were not working out the way I wanted and I felt that things were unraveling before me, that I was not going to get to where I wanted to go. The fighter in me began to rise up my thoughts began something like this, ” I will be moving this week come hell or high water, I don’t care what I have to do, this will happen!”  And my anxiety grew and I could not feel the spirit of the Lord with me, I hate that feeling! So I began to get still inside, quieting my thoughts and striving to connect back with my heart.  I began to speak to myself again “You are in the Lord’s hands, he will help you and watch over you. Maybe this is all happening for a reason. Let him guide you, go with the flow. ”

It has been a year now since I wrote this and on that day, I did move forward, my children and I, with my cousins help, moved 2 hours away and started our new life.  It has been a journey of learning and I have been a witness of many miracles. God sustained us and opened doors that day, just as He has every day since.  He has sent people at needed times and Angels to uplift, sustain and edify me and my family.  He has blessed us with money out of  no where and opportunities for more. To this day, I continue to learn that God speaks to us in many different ways, but the most powerful way is when He speaks directly to our hearts in a way that we must be still to hear and know.

I’ve come to understand that being still means that I quiet my mind, I stop thinking and I just quiet everything in my body and feel.  When I do this, it’s when I can feel Him so near and in a quiet but powerful way He speaks right to my heart.  I have noticed that knowing this has given me so much strength and direction in the mist of confusion.  I know that if I can get quiet and look into my heart, He will be there and I know it is Him because only He can speak to the heart, my spirit. His still small voice, cuts through the loud confusion and fear and anxiety quickly. His voice is gentle, direct and  brings peace and a feeling of overall well being.

“Being still”  means that we don’t react to the voices of fear and doubt and negativity that surround us and bombard our minds on a consistent basis.  God knows when we get still, we are putting ourselves in a place of hearing and receiving, its when we can receive clearly and then move forward with power. Getting still requires us to use our agency in a powerful way in the midst of confusion, confusion is of the devil, he wants us to get caught up in reacting.  When we react to fear and anxiety, we give Satan power over us, but when we make the choice to get still in the midst of confusion, we are taking a very powerful stand for ourselves and God.  We are disengaging from the confusion that is of Satan, we are saying “I see you Satan, I know what this is and I am not going to participate and you cannot have power over me.”   When we choose to get still and seek God, we are showing forth true power and inviting God’s power to carry us forward and through.   So when you and I begin to feel worry, doubt, fear and anxiety….we need to recognize it for what it is, and then get still, look for God, invite Him into our hearts and receive what He has to give.  God truly lives, is over all and offers His love and peace always in every moment. We  just need to “be still and know that he IS God.”bestill

Where is your heart?

This morning as I was reading in the bible Matt 6 :24 about how man can not serve 2 masters or we will either hate the one and love the other, or despise the one and hold to the other. We cannot serve God and mammon.  It made me really begin to think about who I am really serving and then where my heart is truly.  I believe that it is coming to a time where we can not be divided in any part of us, we cannot serve two masters, we cannot serve the heart and the head. We can not be undecided on who’s side we are on, who we serve and where are hearts are.  My heart has been divided, I say that I love God, but then I worry about what others think of me and I let others advice and opinion take precedence over what God has already told me in my heart.  I have had many people say…follow your heart and I believe the reason why we say this to each other is because essentially our heart is the center, our hearts are our spirit and our spirits are light and truth, godliness if you will, the same essence of God.

As I have pondered more this morning, these are the thoughts that came to me. When you are serving God, when you give your whole heart to him and serving him, really you are just being true to the truest part of yourself. You are actually coming into alignment with your true power and that is your Godly spirit. God doesn’t ask us to serve only him and give our hearts to only him because he is selfish and jealous, he asks us to do this because he knows in this we become truly free to rise to our highest potential. When we give our hearts to him, when we choose one path and are solid and firm in that, when we partner with him, we become our most powerful , highest self….experienced. When we partner with heaven, nothing can match that power. Our heart center is where the greatest amount of light resides, it’s the center of our spirit, it’s where our will lives, so when we turn our hearts to him and commit to love only light and truth and life, we are taking a powerful stand and in this we become free, we become one within ourselves, within the universe and with all that is light and truth and goodness. It’s when we split between serving God and Man that the trouble begins. The trap lies in wanting to serve God, but being afraid of what man thinks. When we become afraid of what men think, and let what they will do or not do permeate our thoughts and influence our decisions, we become divided within ourselves. A house divided cannot stand, so when we are divided within ourselves, we have no strength to stand against the trials and challenges of the day.
No Man can serve 2 masters for either he will hate the one and love the other or else he will hold to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and mammon. I realize I have been trying to serve 2 masters, my heart has been telling me to go in one direction and I feel peace, but then my head starts….”what will so and so think?”  or “so and so will be disappointed in you!”  or  “you are going to look like you are crazy!”  How many of us walk around in this battle every day?  It’s because we are not firm in our resolve to serve God and him only.  When those thoughts come we get taken off course, we begin to feel confused, angry, deceitful, depressed.  It is our responsibility to know where are heart lies, to choose whom we truly are going to serve and then stick to that come what may. This is where peace and happiness truly begin and stay.  So I say….choose whom you are going to serve and serve with and stand firm in your resolve, as for me I serve the Lord and place my trust in Him….come what may.

Who is Jesus?


As I was sitting down to write this morning, I asked the Lord, as I always do, to guide my words.  I asked that my words would bring comfort and help….this is the title that came to my mind.  Now, I’m not a professor of religion and so of course, I won’t be going into all the secular knowledge….or even the scriptural references. If you will indulge me in this post, I feel the desire to share who Jesus is to me.

Jesus is the Son of God, He incarnated God when he came to this world.  He is the most gentle, yet powerful being I have ever felt or come to know. His love is kind and consistent, encouraging and all encompassing.  He is a loyal and constant friend.  He lives in the hearts of those who let him and welcome him. When Jesus is in you, you know it because you have peace, you have love for those around you and even those that you don’t know.  You want to be better, be more, do more to help others.   Jesus is the friend that never leaves, the constant companion that lifts you up, encourages you and shows you the way when you ask.  He speaks very openly and frankly when you ask him for honesty and guidance.

The thing I have come to understand the most about Jesus, is that He is the Savior of the World and He is the Savior because He has literally saved the world and all of us who live in it from an eternal death. To understand this and accept this gift we must come to Him and let Him into our hearts and into our lives.  There is no pain or suffering that He does not understand, for He truly did suffer it all and took our personal suffering upon himself in the Garden of Gethsemane and on the Cross of Calvary. He did this so he could be a personal and personable Savior.  Because of His loving sacrifice, his willing atonement, He understands each one of us on a level that we cannot comprehend. We can however, come to know him personally through the gift of his personal sacrifice. When we use the gift and power of the Atonement in our daily lives it enables us to become At-One with Christ.  We become new, with His power in us we can heal from all manner of physical and spiritual diseases.  His enabling power can literally heal every part of us from the inside out.

When I teach my class on the Power of Forgiveness, what i am teaching is what He has taught me, helped me to do and whispered to me over and over again. Christ loves us so much that he wants us to be free in every part of our lives, he wants us to be free from guilt, shame, remorse, fear, hatred,  and all those emotions that block out our ability to feel love and peace and goodness.  He wants us to be free to create, He wants us to be free from faulty thinking that has been passed down through generations that keeps us trapped in reacting and fog our view of truth daily.  All those feelings and negative energies that block out our ability to feel him in our hearts, He wants us to be free, and has provided the way. He is the way!  He has walked with me through the pain of childhood sexual abuse, teenage rape, depression, anxiety, homelessness, mental breakdown….and so much more.  His love has healed those parts of me that no one could reach, no therapist or medicine could heal. His light and his love are all encompassing, all powerful. He is my one true friend, the one who has seen me through it all, who has carried me triumphant to the other side day in and day out. He is magnificent and in Him….I am magnificent and so are you!

Today, I just invite you, if you do not know Jesus or have not invited him into your life.  Do it!  You can’t afford not too, He is the One true Source of Light and Love, He is the one who gives and grants miracles, who rescues us from our darkest selves and the darkness around.  He is the God that can walk by our side, to lead and guide us.  He is the one that you have been looking for every day to rescue you from your own personal hell and to take you to the next level in your life.  Jesus Christ is the One…..He is the Savior of the World and my personal savior and yours. My daily prayer is that you come to Him and that I can be a light to show the way to Him. If you already know Him….be the light too and make a difference!